這就是我在1月25日那個早晨的所作所為。我23歲，住在倫敦北部的艾靈頓，是一個美裔猶太人，職業是攝影記者。以前我曾去過中東：作為一個學生在the intifada。期間到過巴勒斯坦西岸。我也曾作為《新聞週刊》的記者到過阿富汗。
人肉盾牌吸引著我的立場，但是，當五週後我離開巴格達時，我的觀點急劇地改變了。我不會說我支持戰爭－－不，我有點矛盾－－但是我非常強烈地想看到除掉薩達姆。
我們在車上自我感覺對伊拉克人民充滿了熱情，儘管我們一無所知。除了抗議美國和英國政府外，一行人等對伊拉克人為自己的權利而作的奮鬥毫無興趣。
當我那天晚上遇到一位支持戰爭的伊拉克人時，我被震動了。這是一位出租車司機，那天晚上載著我回我住的旅館。我向他解釋說，我是美國人，然後就像人肉盾牌通常做的那樣，對他說：「布希壞！戰爭壞！伊拉克好！」他愕然地看了看我。
當他明白了我是嚴肅的時，他減慢了車速，並開始用蹩腳的英語談論起薩達姆政府的罪惡。此前我卻只聽到人們用尊敬的口氣談論這位總統，但是現在，這個人卻對我說，伊拉克的錢是如何進了薩達姆的腰包，而且如果你敢在政治上反對他，那麼他就會殺你全家。
這話著實讓我嚇了一跳！起初我還以為是秘密警察在套我，後來我才明白他希望我幫助他逃亡。我覺得很糟糕。於是就對他說：「聽著，我只是一個從美國來的schmuck，我不是聯合國人員更不是中情局的－－我真的沒法幫你。」
我當然聽說過伊拉克人恨薩達姆的報導，但這回卻是真的。有人曾面對面地向我作過解釋。我告訴過我認識一些記者。他們說那種事情經常都會有－－自發地，充滿感情地懇求來訪者幫他們逃離薩達姆統治下的專制的伊拉克。
我開始考慮伊拉克政府限制人肉盾牌的方式，因此幾天之後我和其他五個人一道，搭出租車離開伊拉克到了約旦。一過了邊界，我便覺得足夠安穩，便同司機聊起我對伊拉克政府和空襲威脅的看法。
「你聽過美國之音上鮑威爾的聲音嗎？」他說：「美國人當然不會轟炸平民。他們想炸的是政府和薩達姆的宮殿。我們希望美國轟炸薩達姆。」
我們一行人只是坐著、聽著，嘴張得老大。司機一邊描述著[伊拉克]政府的恐怖，我們當中的傑克則一邊不停地說著：「哦！天吶！」傑覺被自己的傻勁給驚呆了。其實我們都一樣。這從來沒有人聽說過：伊拉克人真的支持戰爭。
那位司機用極富感情的話語說道：「所有的伊拉克人民都盼著這場戰爭。」他很肯定地說平民的傷亡將會很小。他對美國的戰爭機器能夠信守諾言充滿了信心。真的是超過了我們所有的人。
也許我們所瞭解到的最驚人的事情是最普通的伊拉克人都認為薩達姆出錢請我們到伊拉克來進行抗議。儘管我解釋說這絕對不是事實，我還是能認為他相信我們。然後他問我：「真的，薩達姆給了多少錢讓你來這兒？」
這話擊中了我們的內心和感情：這就是伊拉克真實生活的素描。在第一次談話之後，我徹底反思了自己對伊拉克問題的觀點。我想起了在過去兩週中到處看到的薩達姆頭像，並試著讓自己將心比心地感受那些在過去二十年中被迫天天看到這些頭像的人。
上週六晚上，我到議會廣場支拍攝反戰示威的照片。成千上萬的人都在高呼「不要戰爭！」但卻從未想過這對伊拉克人民的意義。當中的一些喝酒、跳桑巴舞，還勸警察離開，正如這些人在談論一個迥然不同的但完全為人所接受的政府。這真的讓我很沮喪。
不管誰只要他還有點腦子就一定能看出來薩達姆就要被除掉了。這真是極度嘈諷的一幕：反戰分子們在為一個政府遊行－－但這個政府卻禁止它的人民享有這種自由。
原文網址：http://www.opinion.telegraph.co.uk/opinion/main.jhtml;$sessionid$3NQ5TQZNM4L01QFIQMGSFFOAVCBQWIV0?xml=/opinion/2003/03/23/do2305.xml&sSheet=/opinion/2003/03/23/ixop.html
I was a naive fool to be a human shield for Saddam
By Daniel Pepper
(Filed: 23/03/2003)
I wanted to join the human shields in Baghdad because it was direct action which had a chance of bringing the anti-war movement to the forefront of world attention. It was inspiring: the human shield volunteers were making a sacrifice for their political views - much more of a personal investment than going to a demonstration in Washington or London. It was simple - you get on the bus and you represent yourself.
So that is exactly what I did on the morning of Saturday, January 25. I am a 23-year-old Jewish-American photographer living in Islington, north London. I had travelled in the Middle East before: as a student, I went to the Palestinian West Bank during the intifada. I also went to Afghanistan as a photographer for Newsweek.
The human shields appealed to my anti-war stance, but by the time I had left Baghdad five weeks later my views had changed drastically. I wouldn』t say that I was exactly pro-war - no, I am ambivalent - but I have a strong desire to see Saddam removed.
We on the bus felt that we were sympathetic to the views of the Iraqi civilians, even though we didn』t actually know any. The group was less interested in standing up for their rights than protesting against the US and UK governments.
I was shocked when I first met a pro-war Iraqi in Baghdad - a taxi driver taking me back to my hotel late at night. I explained that I was American and said, as we shields always did, 「Bush bad, war bad, Iraq good「. He looked at me with an expression of incredulity.
As he realised I was serious, he slowed down and started to speak in broken English about the evils of Saddam』s regime. Until then I had only heard the President spoken of with respect, but now this guy was telling me how all of Iraq』s oil money went into Saddam』s pocket and that if you opposed him politically he would kill your whole family.
It scared the hell out of me. First I was thinking that maybe it was the secret police trying to trick me but later I got the impression that he wanted me to help him escape. I felt so bad. I told him: 「Listen, I am just a schmuck from the United States, I am not with the UN, I』m not with the CIA - I just can』t help you.「
Of course I had read reports that Iraqis hated Saddam Hussein, but this was the real thing. Someone had explained it to me face to face. I told a few journalists who I knew. They said that this sort of thing often happened - spontaneous, emotional, and secretive outbursts imploring visitors to free them from Saddam』s tyrannical Iraq.
I became increasingly concerned about the way the Iraqi regime was restricting the movement of the shields, so a few days later I left Baghdad for Jordan by taxi with five others. Once over the border we felt comfortable enough to ask our driver what he felt about the regime and the threat of an aerial bombardment.
「Don』t you listen to Powell on Voice of America radio?「 he said. 「Of course the Americans don』t want to bomb civilians. They want to bomb government and Saddam』s palaces. We want America to bomb Saddam.「
We just sat, listening, our mouths open wide. Jake, one of the others, just kept saying, 「Oh my God「 as the driver described the horrors of the regime. Jake was so shocked at how naive he had been. We all were. It hadn』t occurred to anyone that the Iraqis might actually be pro-war.
The driver』s most emphatic statement was: 「All Iraqi people want this war.「 He seemed convinced that civilian casualties would be small; he had such enormous faith in the American war machine to follow through on its promises. Certainly more faith than any of us had.
Perhaps the most crushing thing we learned was that most ordinary Iraqis thought Saddam Hussein had paid us to come to protest in Iraq. Although we explained that this was categorically not the case, I don』t think he believed us. Later he asked me: 「Really, how much did Saddam pay you to come?「
It hit me on visceral and emotional levels: this was a real portrayal of Iraq life. After the first conversation, I completely rethought my view of the Iraqi situation. My understanding changed on intellectual, emotional, psychological levels. I remembered the experience of seeing Saddam』s egomaniacal portraits everywhere for the past two weeks and tried to place myself in the shoes of someone who had been subjected to seeing them every day for the last 20 or so years.
Last Thursday night I went to photograph the anti-war rally in Parliament Square. Thousands of people were shouting 「No war「 but without thinking about the implications for Iraqis. Some of them were drinking, dancing to Samba music and sparring with the police. It was as if the protesters were talking about a different country where the ruling government is perfectly acceptable. It really upset me.
Anyone with half a brain must see that Saddam has to be taken out. It is extraordinarily ironic that the anti-war protesters are marching to defend a government which stops its people exercising that freedom.
© Copyright of Telegraph Group Limited 2003
